What to Do When an Aging Parent Refuses Home Care

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Conflicts regarding the type of care a senior adult receives are among the most difficult challenges family caregivers face. While you know your elderly loved one will benefit from having assistance with his or her daily needs, the idea is often met with resistance. Instead of arguing, try these tips to facilitate a smooth conversation.

Be Patient

It may take several conversations before your loved one is willing to admit why he or she is refusing care. The conversation might start to feel repetitive, and it’s not uncommon for seniors to become defensive when first broaching the subject. Never push your loved one, and end conversations before they have a chance to become sour.

Get to the Heart of the Matter

Try to ask open-ended questions that will encourage your loved one to share more insight into why he or she is adamantly against additional assistance. Narrowing down your loved one’s concerns to privacy issues, a fear of losing independence, or anxiety about being around a stranger can help you direct your efforts toward alleviating these fears.

Recruit Help

Consider having someone your loved one trusts provide a second opinion. This could be a doctor, a neighbor, a social worker or even an old friend who already uses a Vancouver elder care agency. Just make sure that the person will echo your opinions before you set him or her up to help.

Provide Options

No one likes feeling left out of an important decision regarding his or her life. Show your loved one that his or her opinion matters, and that home care is about promoting independence–not taking it away. Find out what areas of daily living your loved one would prefer help with, and let him or her choose how many days a week a Vancouver caregiver will visit. Presenting choices is a simple way to get your loved one and put him or her in control of the situation.

Use an Indirect Reason

If your loved one requires home care because of a condition that requires supervision, such as Alzheimer’s, try focusing on another reason why he or she may benefit from a caregiver. For example, you could start by saying that a caregiver will prepare healthy meals and assist with daily exercise. This will give your loved one a chance to slowly come around to the idea and adjust to having someone new in his or her home.

Learn more about home care services in Vancouver by reaching out to Home Care Assistance. We provide live-in and hourly care, as well as Alzheimer’s, dementia, Parkinson’s, and post-stroke care Vancouver families trust. Call a Case Manager today at (778) 279-3634 and request a free in-home consultation.


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